Joey Cloudy online

chapter 19

TRAMP: Bring On The Nubilez

“Let me! Let me! Let me! Let me! 

Fuck You! Fuck You! Fuck You! Fuck You!” 

-The Stranglers  

Laurel lived in a large two bedroom apartment in Addison, one of the financially secured northern suburbs of Dallas county, about a twenty minute drive north of the Deep Ellum. Laurels roommate Kelley was her exact physical opposite, where Laurel and Morgan were short she was tall. Laurel had naturally red hair with a rainbow assortment of highlights from to fuchsia to electric purple. Morgan’s hair was puppy dog brown, while Kelley’s long straight hair was platinum blonde. While they were built like little teapots; short and stout, Kelley’s tall frame was slender as a rail, there wasn’t an ounce of excess fat on her body and that was the source of her ongoing dilemma. where Laurel and Morgan each had copious breast, Kelley was a carpenters dream, flat as a board and never been screwed. Well she had been screwed alright, the way she saw things those big tits were a complete waste on a couple of cows as beastly looking as her two best friends since grade school Morgan and Laurel. God apparently had an awfully sick sense of humor. Kelley looked as if she had just stepped out of the pages of Vogue magazine, but she had no self esteem. She’d succeeded in convincing herself that she was ugly because she had tiny breast.

Aaron sat at the computer in the dining room transcribing the poems from his notebooks into Word. He was always awake when Kellie staggered in stupid drunk after a nights partying pissed off. He watches as she reaches into her useless bra and pulls out her silicone falsies. She stood there for several minutes swaying in an unfelt breeze seething with impotent rage glaring at the translucent bag filled with the gelatinous material before she’d hurl the thing as hard as she could across the room. It slammed against the wall with a muffled thud. Kellie approached Aaron smiled without humor pulled the other one out of her bra and placed it in his hand. He could still feel the heat of her body on it against his palm. Then she silently staggered off towards her bedroom. Kelley had decided that she was going to do whatever it took to get a boob job as soon as possible. Like a lot of young women she thought that the source of all her life’s problems were the result of her being flat-chested.  

Laurel went to work at her second job as the desk clerk at the Radisson hotel leaving Kelley alone in the apartment with Aaron. He smoked her out as they drank beers while he, as usual was typing up poems. She confessed to him that one night that she had sent a photograph of herself, or at least a close-up of her vagina to Playboy magazine and that they had written her back saying that she had the prettiest, most perfect pussy they had ever seen. She was proud of that and she wanted to show him the most perfect part of her body. He couldn’t accept her generous offer because that would have been against the rules. She knew it, but at that moment she didn’t care. The rules were simple if you were dating someone you were free to do whatever you wanted when you were together at a party but sneaking off to screw around on your own was cheating. Kelley was a little pissed because she knew that Aaron was turned on by her and she knew that Laurel broke the rules regularly but that didn’t matter.

I know all about Laurels hooking up, the double header with the two west Indian businessmen that she picked up while they were in town for a convention staying in the hotel where she works, I know that she’s still hooking up with the drunk Mexican kid that she gave up her virginity to the day before we slept together. I don’t do the virgin thing. I even know about the night she got picked up by a complete stranger while driving down the Central Expressway on her way to pick me up at my house. I know they snorted his cocaine in the parking lot of Denney’s before they fucked in the backseat of his car.

Why won’t you sleep with me then?

I have an obligation to myself to maintain my personal integrity. Laurel doesn’t.

I don’t understand.

As an ethical being it’s all of matter of survival. I don’t lie about who I am or what I do, Laurel does. I don’t do anything that I’m ashamed of, Laurel is ashamed of everything that she does. As long as she’s my girlfriend I will treat her with the same respect I demand to be treated with. Only when she’s not my girlfriend anymore am I’m merely obligated to be civil. But when I am single, and only then, do I have to right to fuck whomever I want. Although, I doubt that I’ll ever want another woman as much as I want you right now. Maintaining my personal integrity is worth more to me than even the promise of the love of a beautiful woman such as yourself.

I’m a poet baby, if my word means nothing then my life means nothing.

I guess I understand. Kelley looked down at Aaron as he lay stretched out on the couch with his head resting on her lap. Then she leaned down and kissed him gently on the forehead. I think you’re fucking amazing.

Not as amazing as you. Kelley smiled at Aaron as they shared the joint and the sweetness of each other’s silence and thought about the promises life held for each in their separate futures.

How did you find out about all of Laurel’s other guys that she’s been hooking up with?

Well kiddo, this ain’t my first rodeo. You don’t get be forty and divorced twice without learning a few things about women.

Bullshit! Chrissie told you. And you’re not forty yet, you’re thirty-eight.

Yep, you are correct on both points. how’d you guess it was Chrissie?

Jeezs, She practically lives here every since you and Laurel started dating. it’s so obvious she wants to hook up with you so bad I can taste it.

Is it that obvious?

She couldn’t be any more obvious if she fell over naked with her legs in the air. Kelley laughed at her own joke harder than Aaron, he saw that there was something mean in it, she loved Chrissie and hated her at the same time. Chrissie had a nice firm pair of medium sized tits that looked large on her tiny frame.

You ever been in love?

I thought that you never talked about love? Her eyes were laughing a little now, the hardness that was there just a moment ago when she was laughing at Chrissie had vanished.

No, I talk about love all the time. What I don’t do is use the word love in my poems.

You are so full of it dude most of the poems I’ve heard you read have been love poems so what is this I don’t write love poems bullshit. She taunted.

I didn’t say that I didn’t write about love. All of my poems are about love and existence, sex and death and pain without reason which are really casualties of unrequited love and rejection of death any ways. But what I said was that I try not to use the word LOVE in my poems. It’s the word I forbid myself to use not the subject. Kelley sat there for a moment silent as she thought about what Aaron had said for a minute. She could have sworn that he used the word in lots of poems before but now she couldn’t think of a single line of all of the lines of his poetry that she had memorized nor could she dredge up to her fuzzy consciousness any that actually had the word LOVE in it. She thought about getting up and going over to the computer to do a word search in the file where he kept his poetry but that smacked of effort and she was too comfortable to move right now so she conceded.

Fuck! You’re right I can’t actually recall a single line that uses the word love.

You could have a career in politics the way you so smoothly evaded answering my question.

What was the question again I’m a little stoned?

Have you ever been in love? Kelley thought about it for a moment before she finally answered yeah I guess.

You haven’t been in love yet.

What makes you say it so matter of factly?

Because you had to think about it and your answer wasn’t given with much conviction. If you’ve ever really actually been in love then there’s nothing to think about you’d have responded immediately yea or nay. But there would have been nothing to think about.

Are you in love with Laurel?

I love her.

It’s not the same thing.

No, I’m not in love with her.

I thought you were in love with her?

No, I know the difference and I’m definitely not in love with her.

Then why are you so loyal to her when you know she’s not loyal to you.

It doesn’t matter to me what Laurel does when I’m not around.

Why do you date her? Why did you choose her when you could have dated any one of us?

Because she asked first.

You lie that’s not what she told us.

Doesn’t matter, I never chase women Kelley you’ve known me long enough to know that’s not my style.

Yeah you’re like the most laid back totally relaxed guys around women that I’ve ever met. Most guys that stay the night are such perverts. If it’s not with a some lewd remark every other minute then it’s the quiet ones who just sit there looking like love sick puppies, little sex starved freaks act as if they’ve never seen a girl before and no matter how cool they try to be about it you know that they are sitting there about to soak their shorts. But I feel relaxed with you.

I grew up in the company of women and I feel comfortable, I don’t feel like I have to be on.

Yeah, you’re nothing like you are in your poetry or on stage I mean you’re you but you’re not a Cro-Magnon chauvinistic asshole.

Thank you.

I mean that you’re really sweet when you wanna be.

You’re pretty sweet too kiddo and I really do like the new piece you read it was pretty cool.

You see, that is exactly what I mean! If any other guy said that to me I would know that he was lying, face it, most guys will say anything to get laid. But not you, it’s so strange what you want is right here and you can have it anytime you want it but I know that you won’t and for some reason that makes me feel… respected.

The reason that you feel respected is because you are respected.

And I know you well enough to realize that you never lie about poetry.

It’s all I got.

You’ve got a lot more going for you than just your poetry.

Thanks. But I meant my word. I am a man, and you might think it’s old fashioned, but where I come from a man is only as good as his word. I am only as good as the poem.  

-about the author JD Cloudy’s poetry has disappeared in the literary journals; Fatfizz, Mad Swirl, Texas Beat Anthology, Danse Macabre, Du Jour, and Death List Five. He has won no literary awards, entered no slam competitions, and never completed college. He lives to write in Dallas, Tx.