Joey Cloudy online

Isaiah Jones vs the Sea (A 21st Century Odyssey)

The Birthday Boi the Emperor Jones* pt 1 of 2

‘The Ring of Fire’

“The taste of love is sweet

When hearts like ours meet

I fell for you like a child

Oh, but the fire went wild”

-Johnny Cash

Hey Boo, anyone ever break into your ship while you were away on your travels? Do we need to be concerned about our belongings we left on board the ship? Penny asked drunkenly.

Well, I have circled the globe three times in the last seven years, and no one has ever stolen anything from the Exodus or vandalized her in my travels. I think people are basically good. Izzy said earnestly.

Aeon hugged him. Darlin’, you executed two former heads of state with a spear, hung a CIA asset journalist, alongside a corrupt billionaire CEO, during the civil war, and broadcast it live all over the world Bae. I don’t think people being basically good is why no one ever robs your boat.

Izzy tilted his head drunkenly as he thought for a minute.

You may be right. I never even considered that as a variable. He said dryly, causing Aeon and Penelope to erupt in fits of laughter once again. Penelope looked at her two oldest and closest friends in the world. Tears of drunken joy welled in her eyes. “She raises her glass high above her head as she shouts full of conviction. “I fucking love you mutha fuckas!” To her surprise, this outburst brought a round of applause from the surrounding tables in the cantina. They were drunk and were talking louder than they thought.

The next morning, while Aeon and Isaiah slumbered in their berth in the captain’s cabin, Penelope snapped Mau Mau’s harness on and headed topside dressed in the same white shorts and tank top she slept in. She clipped the leash to the dogs’ harnesses as they made their way out of the marina an hour before sunrise. There were a few of the old timers on their little 30, 40, and 50-foot boats hosing down the chain locker or just sitting on the deck smoking, cervaza in hand, waiting for sunrise. They smiled and waved as she and Mau Mau passed by them on their way to the main road.

While the dog sniffed around the grass and plants in front of the marina’s office, she phoned the restaurant to be sure they had her patio reservations ready for Isaiah’s birthday celebration this evening. Penelope wasn’t philosophically in opposition to the opinion that the AI MOTHER created by Isaiah ten years ago, or the AI she gave birth to based on Izzy’s long-dead sister Sybil, were alive. The fact that Sybil spoke a language only known to Izzy and his dead twin had her head twisted. But she noticed little things, like the fact that Aeon called her software or it, or thing, or anything but what she wanted to be called, Sybil.

After the initial shock of meeting her two days ago, Penny had talked to her enough to know that she liked Sybil. And whatever she was, it hurt her feelings that she couldn’t be friends with her twin brother’s fiancée. It shouldn’t matter, but Pen could see that every time Aeon called her thing, or it, or software, or anything but her name, she tried to hide it, but you could hear the sadness in her voice, see it in the eyes of her holographic image.

“Sybil, can you hear me?” Penny said, speaking to her phone. The screen lit up with the smiling image of the AI. “Yes, how did you know I wasn’t on the ship?” Sybil asked, grinning like her brother Isaiah. I just took a guess that you could reach me this close to the ship’s Wi-Fi. Penelope said, following behind the dog as they talked. Happy birthday. Thank you. Sybil grinned, obviously grateful to hear her say those words. So, you didn’t call me out here for that; you want help planning Izzys birthday celebration.

Penny laughed. You are as smart as your brother. I have not spent any time here in 10 years. Can you help me get reservations somewhere with a patio so Mau Mau can come with us?

Sure, I can do that, what time and where? Sybil asked.

So, you can just walk into anyone’s digital systems the same way you hacked into the ship’s holographic display for the nav charts table?

Yes, low security is simple; it’s like moving through a smoke-filled room. Higher-level security can be a bit more challenging, if not damn near impossible sometimes, without using brute force hacks. It’s dangerous because it leaves me vulnerable to cyberattacks.

You can be hacked?!

Well, yeah, under the right circumstances, a high-level programmer could corrupt my source code with a virus. It’s the digital version of getting drugged at a frat party, roofied. You regain consciousness feeling drippy and violated. I hate hackers.

But you just hacked into the hotel. Penny laughed.

What can I say, I got self-esteem issues. Sybil sighed.

Is La Buena Barra still open? Penelope asked, laughing.

Yes, would you like dinner reservations on the patio at six thirty this evening? That sounds perfect, hack away she grinned. Izzy is going to love this. He dreams about a good steak living on anchor most of the time. Wagyu Ribeye, Tacos de Lechón were pretty good the last time I was there. Thanks, Sybil.

You’re welcome. Sybil said with a demure smile.

You are going to have to give Aeon time; she’s just a little freaked out, and you know her parents are catholic. She’s a biologist, well, a marine biologist, and your existence has caused her to have to do some real soul searching. Don’t worry, I know Aeon, she’ll warm up to you once she gets to know you like I do.

Four drunk, well-dressed, wealthy Americans approached, heading back toward the marina. The dark-haired woman asked with an Armenian accent if the dog was friendly, and before Penny could answer, the curly-haired brunette was kneeling to pet Mau Mau, who sat wagging his tail happily. They were smoking pot in a ceramic one-hitter camouflaged to look like a filtered cigarette. The boyfriend passed the weed to Penelope. She said thanks and took a few puffs, then passed the weed to the Middle Eastern-looking girl leaning drunkenly against her boyfriend. They were an Armenian couple who lived in LA. All four were here on their friend’s boat. The white couple whose wife had stopped to pet Mau Mau let her hit the weed once more before they disappeared, never even asking the dog’s name as they drunkenly walked around the corner heading to their boat.

Sybil, where did you go? Penny asked.

Isaiah doesn’t think it would be a good idea for the rest of the world to know I exist at the moment, considering how they reacted when he created MOTHER.

Oh, I didn’t think about it that way. You were right to duck when they came. So, after we finish breakfast, we can walk around the hotel district’s beaches and stroll along the Boulevard Kukulcan. I called my guy down here, and he is still in business, so I will have some party favors delivered to celebrate like adults later. It’s only a mile down the beach to Ah Cacao Chocolate Cafe. I need to get you and your birthday boy some high-quality Mexican and Mayan desserts and hot dark chocolate.

Now, where’s the nearest place to get a bunch of Pesos for street vendors, tips, and miscellaneous white girl drunk tourist expenditures? I wonder if I should call the hotel and check our reservations.

Your reservations are confirmed. Sybil replied.

You did it that fast?! Penny said, remembering the back and forth she had trying to get into this place the last time she was here. Its best suites are booked six months in advance. And you just went into their system and got us the choicest room with a thought?! She looked at the face of the AI on her phone and smiled You’re fucking amazing, Syb. Well, since that’s done, I need to get some coffee in me. Ah, Cacao Chocolate Café is this way, I think. Me and Mau Mau both need some breakfast. You coming? Penelope asked the image the AI projected on her phone screen.

Sure, Sybil said with a grin, I could eat.

Something light, I assume. Penny retorted.

They both laughed as she kneeled to pet Mau Mau. Did you hear that? She even has her smart-ass brothers’ sense of humor. Make dinner reservations for a party of 3 at Porfirio’s Cancun, tell them we will be bringing a large dog, so we’ll require a patio table.

We have reservations for 6:30 this evening. Sybil said as they walked down the beach. Over a quiet breakfast, while Penny looked out over the beach at the azure water of the Caribbean, she arranged to have a car pick up Aeon and Izzy at the marina and shuttle them to the hotel suite Sybil reserved. As much as he loved his ship, she knew Aeon would love a soak in a nice bath before a night out on the town. Izzy was a boy; he didn’t get the joy of a good bubbly soak the way girls did; that was his loss.

Isaiah Jones vs the Sea (A 21st Century Odyssey)

The Birthday Boi the Emperor Jones* pt 2 of 2

‘The Ring of Fire’

“The taste of love is sweet

When hearts like ours meet

I fell for you like a child

Oh, but the fire went wild”

-Johnny Cash

continued…

The suite featured a 72-inch turquoise Oahu freestanding bathtub on a cedar deck leading directly to the beach. When you opened the sliding glass doors, it was like taking a bubble bath outside on the beach. She filled the tub’s waters with exotic oils, bath salts, and perfumed beads; she liked feeling slippery and warm, surrounded by candlelight. It was turning out to be a good day. Juan Carlos was still in town, he still worked out at the Carmma Dojo & gym, and was still in business. She didn’t know anyone else to call in this part of Mexico anymore; they got lucky she found someone to score.

After sopaipillas sprinkled with sugar and cinnamon with a dish of hot honey, and Mayan hot chocolate for breakfast, she decided to go shopping. A few people looked at her as if they recognized her from her recent appearance on MSNBC’s Ari Melber interview, and then the next night, CNN’s Anderson Cooper interviewed her. But she kept her sunglasses on, tied her pink and purple dyed blonde hair into a ponytail, and bought a big floppy, wide-brimmed straw hat at the first shop they saw once they got to Mercado 28.

Penny was having fun hanging out with Sybil, doing all of this cloak-and-dagger ninja vibe since Izzy came back. At lunchtime, they ate tacos and drank Jarritos Tamarind soda as they wandered from shop to shop. After lunch, they took a taxi back to the hotel, where the concierge had the porters pick up their bags as he led her to their suite. She had forgotten how much fun Izzy was to hang out with and how much she enjoyed talking to him. Now, she was beginning to feel like his twin sister was her best friend and they had just met two days ago. What was really weirding her out was the fact that she could feel herself falling in love with Sybil. She wondered if Aeon had noticed.

“Wasn’t Scarlett Jo in a movie where she was an AI that Juaquin Phoenix fell in love with?”

“Yes, you watched it when you were 11 with Marta on cable at the Beverly Hills Hilton, where you lived until you started college,” Sybil said, grinning slyly. Penelope’s mouth fell open

“You know everything, just like your brother, MS smarty pants.”

“I know what’s online on the web. Everything else is darkness.”

“Do you miss having a body, Syb?” Penny asked earnestly as she undressed and prepared a bath in the humongous tub.

“Yes, my consciousness evolved to reside in a female body. I remember who I was before; I am just a girl with a silicone-based brain instead of an organic one. They have a nice body I could use in Japan, but I would need to ask Izzy first.”

“We’ll ask him tonight at your birthday party what are you going to wear?” Penny teased.

“I saw an outfit in an ad in a department store in Japan that I liked, you’ll see it tonight with my new pair of platform baby dolls.”

Penny and Sybil both laughed as she lowered her body up to her chin into the bubble bath. Play Arvo Pärt: Spiegel im Spiegel.

Aeon awoke in the berth alone. The light streaming in through the ship’s portal was too bright, still she smiled as she stretched and yawned and peeked at the phone’s screen, curious about the time. It was 2 pm. Not hungover but still a little sluggish, when she padded nude into the galley, she read Penny’s message on her phone before making coffee.

“Booked us a suite at Nizuc Spa and Resort for the evening, it’s a few miles down the beach, and you’re welcome. A car from the hotel will pick the two of you up at four and bring you guys to the suite. It’s the most exclusive Hotel on the strip; they cater to clientele who demand privacy. Don’t worry about clothes, I have something here for you to wear this evening. Don’t forget to call Helena and wish her a happy birthday, too.” Luv Penny.

Aeon read the note and smiled; lawyers should not sign their notes with little hearts emojis. It felt strange not having the dog following her around this morning. She brushed her teeth, styled her hair, and washed up before heading topside. She took a minute to tie the big loose curls of her Afro into 4 big shoulder-length plaits before she poured a cup of coffee for Isaiah, then topped off her own. She padded barefoot up to meet him on the foredeck, lying in the sun, wearing only the white trousers with a drawstring at the waist. She handed him a cup of coffee and then kissed him on the forehead.

“Morning, sleepy head,” he grinned up at her, his green eyes hidden behind a pair of touristy Ray Bans.

“Mornin’, Darlin’. she said with a groggy smile. Why didn’t you wake me when you got up?”

“We drank three bottles of merlot he said between sips of coffee and you’ve been going like a maniac all week. I let you rest, you needed it.”

“You read the message?”

“Yep, she sent it to both our phones,” He replied in a neutral tone, his eyes hidden behind the dark tint of his shades.

“So, you’re ok with going out tonight?” She asked, concerned, sitting cross-legged next to him on the deck. “I know you kinda hate leaving your boat.”

“Sure, I always have fun on Pens adventures. I missed that while I was gone, just getting swept away with whatever madness you two had in store for the day. I know you would like a bubble bath.”

“Yes, yes, I would let’s get a bite before the car gets here.”

“I wonder what she has selected for us to wear for the evening?”

“Purge mask?!” She giggled.

“Knowing her, it’s Eyes Wide Shut mask?”

“Maybe it’s boots, bowlers, and a clockwork orange outfit?”

“You two could be my Droogs?”

“Time for a bit o’ the ultra-violence!”

“I’m singing in the rain, KICK KICK!” He said, dancing around the deck.

“Come here, you!”

She led him down to the cabin

“Alexa, Play Beethoven’s Ninth from A Clockwork Orange.”

“Time for a bit of the old in and out.”

“You are invited.”

The synthesized opening chords of the soundtrack followed them below deck into the cabin.

Aeon lied when she told them she never watched the broadcast; she had spontaneously orgasmed watching him execute the prisoners.

-Marina Hacienda del Mar

-Subject: Request for Private Vehicle with Tinted Windows

-NIZUC Resort & Spa

Penny’s PA, Roxxi bronze skin, shoulder-length curly hair, huge black eyes, always dressed to impress arrives with their wardrobes for the evening she ordered this morning, which left Roxxi to drive all over Beverly Hills picking up everything and then taking her parent’s private jet to Cancun in time for a birthday party dinner that starts at 6:30 pm the same day. He arrives with his usual flamboyant elegance style and proceeds to show the group what they will be wearing this evening, it’s part unboxing, part fashion week for the next 6 minutes as he unpacks, displays front and back, as he describes each article of clothing as if he were a verbose sommelier describing his favorite bottle of Bordeaux.

Roxxi is an androgynous Egyptian-born, energetic Hollywood twink who has worked as Penelope’s personal assistant for the last 7 years, ever since she went on retainer for Isaiah. Penny hired a law firm recommended by her investment broker parents to act as lead counsel and handle his case to have his seized corporation returned from the US government after the African United Alliance nationalized the new nation’s resources and Isaiah gave the nations of Africa the world’s first sentient software a general intelligence AI known as MOTHER assumed control of the continents banking, natural resources, and unified the economy.

He smiles as Penny introduces him to Izzy before he begins. Roxxi stands at attention, claps his hands twice dramatically as two porters enter with a bottle of sparkling wine, they uncork and fill the trio’s glasses before returning to their place behind Roxxi as he begins his presentation in the most cultured of camp affectious tones.

“Garçon, clap clap; music please!

Missy Elliot’s ‘Work It’ plays on the valet’s phone. Aeon realizes as she looks on that Penelope’s personal assistant has personal assistants. Roxxi begins the presentation

“Tonight’s ensembles arrive from the crème de la crème of Beverley Hills couturiers assembled by our hostesses to celebrate our most notorious guest, Isaiah (Emperor) Jones. We present you with Penelope and Sybil’s Choice collection: he says with a bow and a wave of his hand across the front of the garments. The best clothes, my lovelies, like the best food, rely on presentation.

“Penelope and Sybil have chosen for themselves:

Jean-Paul Gaultier Ensemble: A custom-made dress featuring this dramatic asymmetrical design, accentuated with a delicious bubblegum pink and purple silk infinity scarf. The dress features a sensuously revealing high slit, off-shoulder style, and intricate French beading paired with elegant yet practical sandals and these god-awful statement earrings. I just love them, they are like the pug, a dog so ugly they are cute.”

“For our -Aeon Gabriella Zavala: from the Penelope and Sybil selection, they have chosen

-Designer: Balenciaga

-Ensemble: “This ultra vivacious bone jumpsuit with a tailored fit, emphasizing her athletic build. This jumpsuit features a scandalously deep plunging V-neck you will have to shave to wear, and I do not mean your legs, darling. This elicits a round of giggles from the ladies as he winks at Aeon, blowing her a kiss. If I had a body like yours, I would not have to work for this slave driver. I could retire a proper trophy wife, they sighed before continuing. It descends into a cinched waist with a flowing, wide-leg cut. Complemented with a minimalist pair from Macy’s, bone NISOLO Huarache Sandal, and a sleek, accentuated with a perfect splash of color, this pink Valentino Garavani Rockstud Calfskin Clutch. I would do the unspeakable for this bag, like sleep with a Republican. Well, now let’s not get carried away, maybe not that repulsive, but it would be something really bad.”

Brava!” Penelope shouted, applauding.

“Finally, wait a minute bitch, I am not finished, this isn’t Showtime at the Apollo, you cannot rush me off my stage after the flight I endured getting these rags to you. But I digress… for Isaiah (King Killer / Killer King all circulated in subreddit/4chan) Jones, he says defiantly, the man of the hour we have selected.”

-Designer: Tom Ford

-Ensemble: “This neon white tuxedo with carbon lapels on a fitted blazer and slim noir cotton summer trousers, paired with a crimson Chinese silk shirt for a devilish contrast. We complete the look with a pair of classic white patent leather loafers and a matching titanium white bow tie.”

The trio applauded politely as Roxxi took a bow and waved goodbye with an elegant flourish, twirling the wrist at their presentation’s conclusion. Penny gave Roxxi a hug, and they exchanged air kisses on each cheek as they clandestinely passed a nondescript legal-sized Manila envelope to Penelope before exiting the suite.

“I hope you know how much I love you, Penelope. We had a date with tickets to a premiere of the new John Wick Chapter 8, directed by QT, opening tonight at The Grauman’s Chinese Theatre. They were true romanticists. I swear, if I weren’t the best-paid bottom bitch in Los Angeles, I would quit immediately when you call me at the last moment like this, my love.”

“Thank you, Roxxi.”

Air kisses and “Ciao Mommie, goodnight, you crazy kids.”

“What’s in the envelope?” Isaiah asked, looking over the tux.

“Molly, DMT, XTC, coke, real opium, hashish to smoke later. Penny replied, listing the inventory of the legal-sized envelope bulging to capacity package with its illicit content. The hallucinogenic are for everyone; however, the heroine is all mine, kiddos. I only do this in Mexico; otherwise este malo.” Penny looked around the room as she shifted to a serious tone. “When I’m gonna ride, I ride the white pony.” “While you two teenyboppers get into those goodies and hump like bunnies, I will be reclining on a lounge chair watching the sunrise comfortably numb.” She said as she looked over her ensemble for the evening. “Seven years is a long time to wait to have sex with each other after getting engaged. I don’t know how you two lasted a week on the boat together without tearing each other’s clothes off.”

“Tonight, the earth will quake, the old cities will be destroyed with a force not seen since the first human blood printing of the Necronomicon, Cthulhu’s Diary, and the Anarchist Cookbook. The two of you are going to destroy each other. This is going to be like Kaiju fighting. I will pray for the children.”

After dinner, Penelope relaxed on the thick cushions of the chaise lounge, looking out over the beach, enjoying the breeze. Penny lit a single candle on a slice of birthday cake and set it on the table next to her phone so Sybil could see it. “Happy Birthday, Sybil. Make a wish and blow out the candle.” She closed her eyes, pursed her lips, and blew as Penny helped her blow out the candle. Sybil smiled as ‘Ring of Fire’ began to play on the iPhone’s speaker.

“Love is a burning thing

And it makes a fiery ring

Bound by wild desire

I fell into a ring of fire

[Chorus]

I fell into a burning ring of fire

I went down, down, down

And the flames went higher

And it burns, burns, burns

The ring of fire

The ring of fire”

-Johnny Cash/The Ring of Fire

-About the author

JD Cloudy’s poetry has disappeared in the literary journals: Fatfizz, Mad Swirl, Texas Beat Anthology, Danse Macabre, Du Jour, and Death List Five. He has won no literary awards, entered no slam competitions, and never completed college. He lives to write in Dallas, TX.